The Christian: Faith vrs Doubt

“A Christian is a brainwashed mofo, who believes there’s a god somewhere. They are naive, short sighted and ridiculous.”

My Dear Christians, I’m sure by now you’re used to the rigid labeling and constant name calling. I’m sure by now you’re aware that your belief in Christ equals love for others irrespective of what they call you. 

Tiring, I know. 

Just like a ritual, we grow up getting attached to whichever religion our parents were probably born into. 

Religion is passed on like a piece of cake at a wedding ceremony—everyone gets a piece of it, as long as they are present. For many of us, we got the cake because we are family, for others because they were friends or sometimes, strangers

Our religiosity is compelled by the kind of connects we have. Nearly every single story points to someone or something someone did. 

What dampens the soul of the believer isn’t their choice to believe but rather their inability to choose what to believe in. It’s as if one is bound to certain doctrines as long as they find themselves in a certain church community.

The need to be accepted and belong,  pressures many to succumb to silence. They rather go with the flow and disbelieve in silence rather than question a doctrine that has probably spanned for centuries. 

We tend to measure the strength and foundation of our faith based on how well we abide by doctrines/principles of the church. The more you hold on to them, the more you’re seen as a faithful servant. 

Clarity is as important as doubt. Sometimes, doubt brings clarity. I usually ask questions. I leave and allow myself to wrestle, because it is better to choose your beliefs than not to. If we have to grow, it doesn’t start from the fact that we were born in the church, because it’s actually easy to drift away or become consumed by activities/events or by just showing up. 

The awareness that we could actually be practicing such (wild consumption of events but no relationship) and inciting others to do same, for me, resonates every single time I question a belief. Usually, I’d realize that that belief was championed by very influential individual(s). The very popular one; is the belief that women should not wear men’s clothing. It’s very strange that for so many years, the bible was used to police women’s choice of clothing and sometimes mere adornment was subjected to stiff criticism.

The bible can be used to defend the truth. It can also be used to defend culturally accepted norms that conflicts with who God is. We need to recognize that the bible is a historical book that presents the lifestyle of a group of people through it all.

However, doctrines/beliefs that are carved as a reflection of how people lived during the bible times, will leave us wanting to settle and eventually bully us to bend to a cultural dispensation that did more harm than good to men and women. 

It’s easy to pick and choose from the bible. In fact, it’s a norm. If it wasn’t, many wouldn’t be allowing practices like the bride price system and child marriage to thrive.  In fact, the former; bride price, has been so normalized that nobody dares question it. If you do, eye brows are raised and sometimes, condescending comments follow.

It’s a pain to see us reject polygamy, incest, slavery, murder, and yet; minimize the kind of harm other accepted practices does to individuals especially women. 

Picking and choosing from the bible not only proves that we are indoctrinated into a belief system influenced by other people’s experiences but it also shows that our idea of God is very limited.

Other peoples experiences with Christ doesn’t represent your experience with him. God is one but can be represented in many ways, that is the epitome of the ‘I AM’.

We can’t use other people’s experiences as bases to predict or yearn for something that might probably not be good for us.

A testimony is relevant; it inspires, encourages and prepares other believers especially those who happen to find themselves in near-hopeless situations. 

It’s an opportunity to trust God and prepare for the shift in your life too.

Spiritual growth is deeper than any church event you can attend or any church doctrine because it is very personal. If we have to grow we need to allow ourselves ask questions and doubt.

Nothing captures my attention more than  doubt. It takes me on a captivating tour with my imagination and helps me delve into scriptures proper with my helper. Doubt makes me attentive. Doubt makes me reason, and curious indulgence with myself day by day, scares me. 

I ask; 

  1. can a snake speak? 
  2. will all non-Christians go to hell? 
  3. why did Moses’ commandment “thou shall not kill” conflict with God’s instruction/permission for men to kill? 
  4. Jesus treated men and women differently but why do we not do the same?

Snap out of it! Snap out of it! 

I used to actually tell myself to snap out of it because many made me believe I was trying to understand God. In fact, eventually I had to stop asking because everyone kept giving the same answers. 

It was as if everyone knew the answers. It was as if they had all gone on a myriad of meetings and whispers were said into their ears. I stopped asking because of fear of being misunderstood. I stopped asking because of fear of being seen as less of a Christian or even someone under “spiritual” attack. I feared asking because their answers made me doubt the more. 

What makes us feel safe as believers isn’t our ability to accept things as they are but our ability to wrestle. What makes us feel safe is when we doubt but still take a stand for Jesus. I have come to understand that faith in Christ is a risk—-and I believe it’s one worth taking. My faith thrives on doubt. 

Faith does not mingle with logic but uncertainties. We are often oblivion of what is to happen, whether or not we have faith.

How do I maneuver my way through doubt then, when I claim Jesus Christ so much? Well, I settle with obedience. 

Perhaps, our inconsistencies are as a result of our inability to decide, properly dissect the bible to understand but quickly rely on external ideas, ideologies and beliefs. Maybe we are unable to decipher between how to live and how not to live, what to choose and what not to chooseU, because we fail to identify what’s seamlessly timeless from what isn’t.

When we constantly say, “Do not do that because God says”, it is often said not because we want to give people room to understand but because we want to coax people to believe that they need not fall under a certain standard. 

It’s okay, but don’t you think we’ll all be better off if we could draw a little more closer to God; the one who gives us the chance to learn? 

If we just want to present ourselves as individuals without mistakes or pretend to everyone that we’re okay, then all we seek to be is perfect. Well, that’s also okay but, our goal as Christians isn’t a chance to be perfect, it’s an opportunity, a journey to becoming more like Christ.

Individuals who don’t learn or get to know God for themselves mostly, tend to idolize other people who do.

Doubt has never been the problem. Perhaps, I am convinced that doubt prepares us better for the truth. When you doubt, you’ll realize very quickly that God gives everyone the room to grow through it. It’s not something to reject, it’s something to embrace. 

God gives room for us all to embrace ourselves and learn to be better —those with little faith and those with so much. 

Do you not know that even your little faith is so big that, it can move mountains? 

4 Replies to “The Christian: Faith vrs Doubt”

  1. God gives room for us all to embrace ourselves and learn to be better —those with little faith and those with so much.

    Do you not know that even your little faith is so big that, it can move mountains?

    I love this… our personal relationship with God is very crucial, through that we get to discover our identity and His plans concerning us…

  2. So cool.,little faith is so big to move mountains.,the greatest ingredient to get our prayers answered is a little faith.
    God stop prayer and don’t ever doubt your faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.,he is the only one given to men by which we will be saved.Acts 4:12

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *